Dear Evil Discussor... Which is better? Apples or Bananas?
And so it is, the second ever installment of your favorite horribly interesting and sometimes grammatically incorrect column entitled Which is better?
This one's easy. Granny Smith? Golden Delicious? McIntosh? Whatever. Any way you slice it (if you didn't catch that awesome punmanship it's because my use of language is so subtly perfect and effortless, it smoothly and seamlessly rolls right over you like hot shower water cascading over your slender shoulders, and down your taut, naked back) my answer is Apples.
Bananas are soft and pasty. And stringy. You don't even really chew them. You gum them.
Apples, on the other hand, are crunchy and crisp. Plus, they don't remind you of that one time you accidentally ate a penis.
Which is better? Squares or Circles?