Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Dear Evil Discussor... Which is more accurate: Evil Discussor or The Magic 8 Ball?
















Yes, I did just reveal to you the very first revealing ever of the revealing of Evil Discussor hisself. You see, he is an evil man, with evil plastic facial features and evil plastic hair. Evil incarnate, I tell you. Nay, I yell at you! Fear him! Fear his evilociousness! It is so evil! His evil, that is! His evil is so terribly evil! Wicked evil! Yes! Cower in its presence! Just try to look away from his evil! Go ahead. Try! See! You can't! His evil burns you like the hot hot sun itself! Yet, still you cannot lower your eyes! You watch as he evillates you before your very frightened evillated eyes!

Anyways, what was the question? Oh yeah. Minijonb wanted to know. E.D. or M.8.B. Which is more accurate? Umm. Well. I guess. Umm. I guess Evil D is. Because Evil D is the most accurate accurator in the whole fucking... shitting... world fuck... uh... Oh fuckit. Come on. Let's call a spade a spade here. How the fuck should I know? I mean, whatthefuck. Shit. Fuck, am I getting tired of having to come up with ridiculous answers to your ridiculous fucking questions, shit. It's not fucking easy, you know. I mean, half the time I'm answering my own fucking questions, and even that's not easy. Shit. I hope you already knew that and I didn't just unwittingly reveal one of my trade secrets. And you're not right now experiencing a string of horribly raw traumatic emotions and mind-numbing revelations like that time you found out that Santa Claus was really your uncle in a fat suit, or that the Easter Bunny was really dead, or that your girlfriend was really a man. Either fucking way, whatever. I'm just not in the mood to come up with some silly answer to this silly business. But. I guess it is the pretext for this whole weblog website fuck thing here. And the only real reason for me to be writing. And you to be reading. So I should at least try. Or at least try to keep up the illusion that I'm trying. Or at least do something I guess. Something at least slightly funny. Or even halfways evil. Like call someone a douchebag or a fucknose or something. Hey, you, you're a fucknose! Was that good? Oh fuckit. I can't even bother. I'm tired. I'm just going to sign off here, if that's cool, douchebag.

Yours,
E.D.

4 Comments:

Blogger copyranter said...

face it plastic face: the 8-ball is eviler than you.

12:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I'm just going to sign off here, if that's cool, douchebag."

No, in fact, it's not cool.

Bitchpants.

2:20 PM  
Blogger minijonb said...

sorry to get all existentialist on your ass... i just really like the Magic 8 Ball... sue me.

3:11 PM  
Blogger Evil Discussor said...

i love it when you get existentialist, minijonb. especially on my ass. i'm just a cranky evil discussor today. crankier even than most days.

11:12 PM  

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